Dear Diary

what about me? He just walked away and left, he just made the decision himself. i wanted him there, i needed him to be there, i kept asking him to stay, please stay, dont leave me, dnt break me like that.
no hold on, i think i just screamed these words in my head, my pride had sealed my mouth. i wanted him to beg, yeah rite, beg for what?

maybe i should start from the begining, tell u the story exactly as it happened, but i dont think i want to look back at this for the rest of my life, cz i mite forget this someday, but i dont want it here to remind me for eternity. so maybe i should tell u what happened, maybe i should just write

dear diary
today was a wonderful day, i am not stupid, i did not do anything i would regrett for the rest of my life.

Dear Diary

Today i am born into a new world, a world not my own, where barriers fall, and rules cease to exist. I don't have to wear my mask anymore, here i can take it off. Here i can be me, with all my beautiful and ugly faces, especially the ugly. Its been so long since i let my ugly face show. It only comes out when I'm in seclusion, and it eats me, it eats me alive. It screams at me, makes me feel guilt. aah guilt, mans self made cage, and i am sentenced there for life. Life with no parole.
Cant look back, there is nothing to be done. Time to move forward. Its so dark. Concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other. Cant stop now. Need to move on. Carry my wounds, and the scars, always there to remind me of what happened, and whats to come. Expect more wounds. Keep smiling, laughing, living, and hating. Hate, its in competition with guilt. I cant say which is worse.
Diary,
Today i am born into a new world, today my journey starts.